A bit belated, but finally posted! Week 4 of the Philosopher Selfie:
Mon. Feb 17 / On holiday Mondays
Today I woke up and had one of those moments where I question what’s real. I lay there and thought – was that really what happened yesterday? That thing and that conversation with that person and that circumstance? Or did I dream it? Reality always seems skewed on holiday Mondays, but I’m telling you, the pirate ship/pet whale memory felt SO REAL.
Tues. Feb 18 / On being in the moment
I have issues with sleep, in that I love sleeping once I’m actually asleep, but I’m never ready to go to sleep. In fact, I feel the same way about most things in my life: when I’m doing an activity I get engrossed in it and don’t want to stop, be it a coffee date, conversation, party, sleep or Game of Thrones Season 3. Which has made me realize an important truth: people say that you should “live in the moment” but what they REALLY mean is be on time for your 2pm appointment.
Wed. Feb 19 / On inspirational bullshit
One coping mechanism that I use from time-to-time is to close and/or avert my eyes and hope to heaven that the thing/person/issue will just go away. In instances like this, I like to think that I really embody the inspirational phrase “Never give up hope!”. Ironically, this coping mechanism has an almost 0% success rate except, for example, when I’m using it on guys trying to pick me up and they give up hope.
In conclusion, inspirational quotes are total bullshit.
Thurs. Feb 20 / On the Olympics
I don’t play hockey and have, in fact, never even put on a pair of hockey skates (growing up in figure skating and all) but dammit if I don’t want to put on a full-visor helmet and play for Team Canada Women’s Hockey all of a sudden. Gloria Steinem, make room on your bench because I have a few new heroes joining you.
Fri. Feb 21 / On performance
Being told you’re “too good” or “too professional” or “too polished” is like being told that everything you were taught to believe about practice, work ethic and goal setting is total bollocks. I DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT THIS MEANS, BENKO. I demand that you clarify.
Sat. Feb 22 / On wanting
Saturday was so much good AND bad smushed into one day. Often my state of mind at the end of the day hinges on the order of the good and the bad. Most importantly, my last sensations of the day need to be of exhilaration, success or happiness, etc. THIS IS WHY men have wanted a sweet, complimentary wife warming their slippers at home and I am torn by two facts: one, that those women deserved to be paid for that job LIKE THE OPRAHS OF GOOD FEELING THAT THEY WERE, and two, dammit if I don’t want one of those too. Maybe Oprah will hire one for me.
Sun. Feb 23 / On delicious feelings
There are only a few things in my life that I have recognized as giving me “delicious” feelings, which is a feeling so thick and sweet within itself that it somehow heightens life, drive, passion. It’s a feeling that tells you THIS IS WHAT LIFE IS MEANT TO BE! The problem is, I’ve never really been able to orchestrate it. These moments just happen – which begs the question: you can orchestrate delight for other people, but can you orchestrate delight for yourself?